42 Weeks

42 Weeks

Can you believe my time in psychiatry is done?

Alright, enough comments from the peanut gallery – you know I meant my time as a med student. While it’s been a fun 6 weeks – I learned lots and saw some interesting people and really enjoyed my time – I don’t see myself become a psychiatrist. I know this disappoints some of my friends; not only for the loss in their dating lives (Sorry, DD), but in the chance I may help them figure out their family. But until either telling someone to ‘Pull yer socks up, mate’ or administering a swift kick in the pants becomes accepted therapy in mental health, I think I’ll look elsewhere for employment.

Not that I am against trying those two therapies whenever possible…

No matter how much fun I had, though, and how much they wanted me to stay on the psych ward (There was mention of a restraining order to keep me from leaving – not sure if that was because they liked me so much or they thought I needed some help. But I digress.), I knew it was time to leave when one of the patients started talking about how she was hallucinating these spotted fish dancing the polka in her room, and they kept dancing until a French chef came in with a sword and cut their heads off.

I figured I should call Pixar Studios to see if I could sell the idea to them – turn it into a cartoon and make a mint…

Speaking of making a mint (King of the Seque, I tells ya), did you hear of the Australian mum-to-be who tried to sell the naming rights to her unborn child on eBay? For a starting price of AU$1 million, you got to attach your corporate name to her kid for a period of 5 years, during which time it – with mum – would be available for appearances, press conferences, media blitzes, publicity tours and so on. As you can imagine, this created a huge controversy over here; some folks even thought she was trying to sell her *kid* on eBay. I knew she wasn’t:

$1 million is *way* too much to pay for a kid.

But it gave me an idea: Why not (yet again) try to get a sponsor for this little adventure I call medical school? The emails, along with the blog, has created a ton of media exposure! I figure I could shill, er, promote a company’s products and no one would ever notice. I could slip in mentions about how I used my Canon camera to take the wonderful pictures you see while wearing my Polo shirt and drinking Dom Perignon. Or how my Under Armour really helped my morning workout! Maybe how I had my Ansell-gloved hand in someone’s, er, body cavity while wearing Spotless brand scrubs! Perhaps I could bring up how putting KY-Jelly on the Welch-Allyn speculum made the, uh, exam easy.

On second thought, maybe not such a good idea.

And with that, it’s the weekend. I start Term 2 on Monday, Anesthetics – more on that next week. For the weekend, I will catch up with some friends who are leaving Adelaide, and see those who are coming back into town. Not to mention enjoying my Coca-Cola while watching the polka-dancing fish…

As always, Love to All and keep working on your 101 List!
Bryan