The Rock

OK, I’ve got a really great idea – follow along with me:

Let’s take the city boy camping. Never mind the fact that he has only been camping twice in his adult life and he considers it ‘roughing it’ when he stays in a hotel that doesn’t have room service. He’ll borrow some camping gear from someone he has never met, and then go out to the middle of the desert with no clue how to even unroll his sleeping bag – let alone how a ‘swag’ works. Throw into the mix two girls tagging along who had never been camping – one of whom brings a blow dryer. Sound like a good idea? While I learned a lot from this little expedition – like a corkscrew being vital camping equipment - let me share with you the biggest thing I discovered through all of this:

At night, in the middle of winter, in the desert, it gets *very* cold.

How cold? Freezing – literally. Who knew? Anyway, welcome to my trip to Uluru! The Rock itself is absolutely amazing; beyond words. We’ve all seen pictures of it, but they are nothing compared to the real thing. (I have posted some pictures on my blog from the trip: www.downunderdoc.blogspot.com ) It almost looks like a painted backdrop to a movie set. The thing is huge; you can see it from miles away and is much larger than you realize. And it changes colors as the sun moves across the sky – reds and oranges from flaming and brilliant to dull. It turns grey sometimes, but I didn’t get to see that. I also didn’t climb it: the local Aboriginals consider Uluru a sacred site; as such, they ask that you respect their beliefs and not climb it. There is also myth that if you take a rock from Uluru, it will bring the owner bad luck until it is returned.

Guess I should rethink my Christmas gifts to all of you, huh?

But after a fun weekend, it was back to the ED on Monday, where reality reared its ugly head. I was doing my best to work up this patient with a swollen cheek; I wanted to impress the head of the department who was on duty that day. I did a full history, examined the patient, came up with a great diagnosis, a full treatment plan; I had all the bells-and-whistles and was really proud of myself. I grabbed the doctors attention, gave her the complete story, told her what I thought the problem was and what should be done. I am expecting her to be so impressed that she gives me the rest of the day off and – on the spot – offer me a job. Obviously someone so good should not be working for free. Her response?

“Really? *That* is what you think is wrong?”

It was at this point I was trying to figure out how to hide in my coffee cup – just long enough to see if the traveling circus was still in town and if they had any openings in their clown troupe (I figure I could be Grumpy the Clown – I’ll just borrow the outfit from my brother. But I digress.). While my plan was very sound for someone with enlarged lymph nodes, there aren’t any lymph nodes in your cheek, so her lump was something else entirely. In other words, I was trying to undo all of evolution and rearrange human anatomy to make things fit what I thought was wrong – like the time I thought I had ovarian cysts.

Might I point out that I am now 6 months away from graduating from medical school?

And with that, it’s the weekend. I have to do a few weekend shifts while I am here; I’ll get those out of the way, along with dinner out with some friends. Not to mention getting this clown nose to stay on…

As always, Love to All and keep working on your 101 List!
Bryan